Desert News

Happenings in Desert Valley.

• The first ever drive through dog nail clinic is up and running. Drive through, put your dog's toes out the window, and Boom! Nails trimmed. Across the street from Stake and Shake.
• The IHOP was the site of a SWAT raid for a catalytic converter theft ring. Pancake service was temporarily interrupted.
• Bingocize is happening at the Senior Center. Play Bingo, get some steps in. It's fun for everyone.
• The wine and rock shop is having a sale on metal alien art.
• The Bikini Snake Lady, the number one snake humane snake removal and relocation specialist for the desert valley, had to wear a leather jacket over her bikini due to a cold snap. However, since most reptiles are brumating during the winter, she's not really relocating any snakes currently.
• Eggs at Aldi are expiring today, but they are $2 per carton.
• Anyone living around Sunset and Lind should know that disrespectful residents have been riding dirt bikes through people's yards. Residents are digging pits with punji sticks to stop this unacceptable behavior. George the rock guy is hosting a class on Friday night on punji stick creation.
• The Cacti tattoo shop is doing a brown bag special for Friday the thirteenth. Pay $50 and pick a random image from a bag. Whatever image you pick gets tattooed on you. Pay $0, and pick a random image from a bag. Then pick from a second bag and get a random body part. You get whatever image you picked tattooed on whatever body part you picked FOR FREE.
• Found pitbull. Last seen eating punji sticks near Sunset. Did not catch. Pitbull seemed dangerous but looks like it needed a home.
• Space Cowboy party in Alligator Hills on Saturday night. Bring own kiddie pool. No dogs. Parrots okay.
• Woman in pink dress seen on multiple home security cameras stealing patio furniture. Dress seems to have small strawberries on it.
• Desert Healing Center is hosting a reiki and tarot card retreat. Base packages priced affordably at $500/night. Contact Sky Blu for further info.